I have to be honest with you all. Ever since I stopped smoking I've put on a few pounds. Ok, maybe more than a few. Ok,ok,ok. Maybe a lot more than what my summer weight should be. You know what? I don't care. I've been a smoker for 20 years and my taste buds are going a little crazy. I admit at first it was an oral fixation thing. Then it became all "Wow! I can taste this!!!". It's pretty neat having this thing called flavor back in your life. Flavor, oh how I have missed thee.
That brings me to part of this post. Normally every summer I lose weight. By now I'm typically down to 170ish pounds. I look and feel good at that weight. It works for me. Now? No. I'm not 170. I think I ate a 170 pound danish for breakfast alone. Holy hell do I ever feel fat. The problem is though, I think I kinda like enjoying my food for a change, ya know? I pick something up that I've eaten a million times before and it tastes like I've never had it before in my life. And it's DEEEEEE-LISH-US! I bet if I ate Elmer's Glue right now I'd be all like "You know what? I could see why kids eat this stuff! Lemme hit that bottle again!". It's disgusting how much I'm eating and it need to stop. I just can't get it to now is all. Before I was a smoker and somewhat in my weight range, now I'm an ex-smoker and very pro vending cart hot dogs and 24 hour diner cream pies ( don't lie, you just went "ooooooo" because you love them too).
Do I grab it and own it this year? Do I stop now and crash diet? I'm so confused. You'd be confused too if all of the sudden everything tasted more gooder somehow.
In related news, has anybody seen Megan Fox lately? I have to say her flaunting her cleavage all over premiers for Transformers 2 to get my attention has worked. Oh, you're a sly one Megan. Very sly indeed. Check and mate my saucy little devil. You win and my body is yours to use in every deviated way you wish. Lemme just grab a few twinkies first and I'll see you in the bedroom you minx. rawr
13 comments:
cunning baby...after tasting the sweet Megan the twinkies will just seem tastless...you will be flying on a sugar...and it will be day before you come down from Megan. hehehe.
smoking...I mean the last joint...er, I mean cigarette I had was satisfying. And boy did i have the munchies afterwards...I stopped smoking so I wouldn't eat. hehehehe. I guess it's the reverse effect.
Bon appetit...sweetie.
Yeah, I been thru the whole stop smoking, get fat routine. But I guess you have to choose between the less of the two evils. Either you smoke or either you walk around all bloated and ish. I know. Not good choices. But such is the hand we are dealt.
Congratulations on quitting smoking. It's very hard to do and even harder to stay off them. Trust me, I've been struggling with my renewed addiction to them for about 6 months now. On the patch, off the patch, etc.
I gained about 10 pounds when I quit nearly 2 years ago. I lost it all when I started smoking again. Now I fully expect to put it all back on again.
The metabolism just sort of goes crazy and comes to a screeching halt when you stop smoking, y'know?
Plus, you being a good cook, you must have a hard time NOT putting food in your mouth.
Enjoy it for a while, as a reward for quitting.
If you have enough fantasies about Megan Fox, you might burn off all those extra calories... Talk about a win-win! and you'll have so much more stamina now, too, now that you aren't clogging your arteries and lungs with toxic smoke.
Good for you, CL.
Dude, I'm just glad you stopped talking about dead people ;)
I don't get the Megan Fox loving - I think she looks very bland and airheaded and a bit too thin :P
Now look here Mr Cunning, never crash diet, it's not worth it. Enjoy your lovely taste buds and if it gets too painful to look in a mirror, get working out!!
don't quite get megan fox. not foxy at all - not like me lol.
not really a chain smoker, nor have any addiction, so wouldn't know about the weight thing. but i think you should enjoy food. food is yummy.
Megan Fox. Mmmm yeah, you know my thoughts on that.
And...you do it to me.... I TOLD YOU SO!!! I told you the over-salty thing wore wear down and suddenly it would be like explosions of rainbows in your mouth. Ok maybe I left out the rainbows bit, I hadda let you be a little surprised.
I'm torn here. I don't think you should diet, just....taper down. Because I know you're not happy at this weight. But the lure of things like meatloaf sammiches drenched in gravy and cheese IS mighty tempting and hard to pass up. Also have to look at it this way - your body is on its way to being a lot healthier now that you don't smoke....losing the quitting weight will make you feel that much more gooder.
Excellent healthy person book: Eat, Move and Be Healthy by Paul Chek.
You, too, can be flat, like stanley.
oh, it must be your blog hits all the right spots on the word verification: hymenest
LOL@ Flat Stanley.
I smoke and I can taste food. In fact, my b/f was here for the week end and all we did was eat. Or so it seems.
I am sure your new love of food will taper off. JUst don;t go back to smoking. Chew gum instead, maybe?
I love it that you 'feel at' just like a girl.
SZJ ~ That Megan is really trying to get my attention again. Did you see she's re-hashing the deal with the "leaked" topless photo's but not bringing legal action? That means she's drawing attention to them all over again because.....obviously she wants me to see her nipples. Done and done, I say.
Reddick ~ How did you lose the weight afterwards? I just have to know.
Karen ~ It's a proven fact patches pills and gums don't work. Cold turkey has the highest success rate. I know, sucks, right?
Abi ~ I'd work out but I'm too lazy. I admit it. I've put in my time of movements and work outs. Believe you me I have. I guess I'm just getting old now. Sad, huh?
Junkie ~ NOBODY is as hot as you. Until you fully give into my stalker ways, I'll have to settle for Megan, though.
Lilly ~ Between you and SZJ up there I'm gonna have to either fight you two for Megan or hold the camera REAL steady like and just direct the three-way like baby Jesus had intended it. As for being healty, I dunno. Out of breath from smoking or out of breath from being overweight now. 50/50.
DIKY ~ Now I have to read on top of being fat? You're a damn sadist!
Uber ~ BF was there for a week and you wasted the time with eating food. Wtf's wrong with you?!?!? Also.... like a girl? I should smack you. My feelings are very hurt. Tell me I'm pretty now or I'm gonna cry!
your pretty
You're the fairest in the land, of course. I thought that went without saying.
Well Spud and I squeezed in a little more than eating[between meals] LOL
hello... hapi blogging... have a nice day! just visiting here....
Well Cunning, you know how I congratulate good ol' boys who quit smoking... :) And don't worry, I'll figure out how to congratulate you some 'more later...
As for your Midol Moment...
You need to drink lots and lots of water. It will help you taste more, and you won't want to each as much. Just when you do, you will enjoy your... food. Yes, I was thinking food.... yeah right. ;)
And whatever you do, for god's sake man, AVOID the Krispy Kreme and Dunkin' Donuts on the way home!
Sinfully delicious pastries, damn.
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